Friday, April 17, 2015

My Two Cents: Shamming the "Mom-Trepeneur"

I wasn't planning on doing another "My Two Cents" post for a while, but I just had to jump in on this one.

I recently came across a blog post on Scary Mommy titled 3-D Lashes, Jamberry & Oter Ways to Lose Facebook Friend. Long story short, it is the newest way for girls to bash women who are just living their own damn lives.

Hi, my name is Maureen. I am a Marine veteran, a full time student, a stay at home mom, a MST advocate, running a homestead... Oh yeah, and I'm in direct sales.

I am totally not a sales person. Actually, I'm pretty shy in certain situations. I mean, I don't even like to order a pizza over the phone. If I can't do it online, I make my husband call. So why in my right mind would I get into something where I have to actually put myself out there? Family.

Garrack works an exceptionally demanding job. My father says, "He's the hardest working SOB I know." It is not uncommon for him to work 100+ hours in a week. So far, his record for overtime is nearly 300 hours. He works all over New England and does a lot of travel for work. During the exceptionally busy months he will be away from home weeks at a time. Weekends and holidays don't keep him at home either. But, as the main source of income for our family (which allows me to go to school full time) he doesn't complain about the steady work.

About a year ago I decided to try my hand at direct sales so that, just maybe, Garrack could cut back on a few hours each week. The hope being that he could then spend more time with his daughter (even if it was just enough time to put her to bed an extra night each week).

I posted on my Facebook about my endeavor and did all the things the woman in the afore mentioned blog post hates. I made a group that I invited people too (mostly just close friends and family), I posted on my page (just once in a while), and I direct messaged folks asking if they would like to host a party. And ya know what? No. Body. Bitched.

Social media is a staple in just about everyone's life now-a-days. And smart business people see that. Anyone who watches Shark Tank has heard entrepreneurs talk about how they built up their sales through Facebook, Twitter, and Instagram without the expense of ads.

And besides, I for one am a huge supporter of local and small business. And though these companies are worth millions, you are still supporting a family run business. I would rather buy a Scentsy warmer and help a mom pay for her car this month so she can take her kids to school than get a Yankee Candle which only benefits the CEO of Yankee Candle (but that's just me).

Sales aside, social media is SOCIAL! Or have we forgotten that? How anyone uses it is up to them. As I've read someone else point out, some folks use it as a way to stay up on current events, some use it as a photo album, and yes, some use it as a way to sell product.

If you don't want to use your social outlets in that way, then don't friend, don't follow, don't subscribe, and don't buy. Remove yourself from the groups (and there is an option after leaving the group to disable anyone to add you again).

"Oh, but I just don't like being in those high pressure sales situations." If you can't say no, I feel bad for you. It must be hard to never say no to a car salesman, or a kiosk worker at the mall who wants you to try this amazing hair straightener, or the cashier at McDonalds who asks if you want to try their newest burger.

Simply, if a friend of yours adds you to their sales group they aren't looking to exploit you, they are looking for support (which you can give without being in their group or hosting a party). Not monetary support, but the kind of support that lets them know that you see they are trying to bring an income into their home and that is something everyone should be able to understand (because, dude, #thestruggleisreal).

Get off you damn high horse.

THIS is why I do direct sales. Deal with it.

17 comments:

  1. Very well put. I always support small business & anyone selling jamboree nails or the tote bags. Any way someone is trying to get extra income is not bothersome.

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  2. I am so very glad you wrote this! I feel the exact same way. The article was way too much and I agree it was just another way to shame other moms. We're all doing the best we can. Thanks for this!

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  3. Hm, I guess my first comment didn't work ^^" I was saying that I agree with you - everyone who doesn't like direct sales, should just not participate in it. If you friend does it, it doesn't mean you have to buy it. And if you can make a side income for you, more power to you :)

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    1. Exactly. Everyone is just doing what they have to in order to support their family. And if I had to choose between direct sales and working a job I absolutely HATE, it's no contest.

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  4. I LOVE this!! I read the post too and thought the SAME things you were gutsy enough to write down. I LOVE that I stumbled on your blog from the link-up on FB. Thanks so much for sharing and making me smile. I'm tired of people putting perimeters on Social media...the rules are: there are no rules!

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    1. YES! I wish people would stop being self-appointed Social Media Police. There are SO many ways to avoid seeing certain adds and updates that there is really no reason to complain unless you are THAT bored.

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  5. Well said, I agree. I don't really buy any of that type of stuff, but that's more from a budgetary stand point. I will say, if someone follows me on Instagram and I look at their page and it's all sales I'm unlikely to follow them back, but my friends using social media to also sell their doesn't bother or offend me at all.

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  6. Well said. I am not a mom but I still agree. As women or even people in general, we should spend more time supporting each other rather than tearing each other down. :-)

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  7. While I see what you're saying I agree with the Scary Mommy article a bit, too. If someone can work from home and actually enjoys it, that's AWESOME, but I've had way too many times when I thought a friend wanted to meet for coffee because she actually wanted to spend time with me, only for it to turn into a sales pitch with her samples and pamplets and everything! Kind of a bummer :(

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    1. That's just bad sales ethics in my opinion. I only give my friends samples and catalogs if they ask me. I'm sorry you have friends that have exploited what they have with you. :/

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  8. I really enjoyed reading this post! Please hi-five for your husband for me for being such an awesome provider and a work hours because he see the potential in his wife and wants her to become her best self! My husband and I have been together for 14yrs so I understand the strain and mental toll that can take on a marriage. HANDS DOWN I am a new fan/follower of yours! The struggle is absolutely real and no matter what the situation is no one has the right to be so judgemental and one tracked minded when it comes to this thing called being A BOSS! People will only do what you allow them to do to you in terms of your boundaries. Kudos to you for putting this on BLAST!

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    1. I'm exceptionally blessed to have such a supportive husband. And I've always said that no one can MAKE you feel offended. If you find offense in something so stupid as someone posting about their business, you might wanna look a little more deeply into why that bothers you so much.

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  9. I completely agree with you Maureen. People need to stop complaining about things which really shouldn't be a concern - if they don't like then they should just move along. I am not in direct sales myself, but if I had a friend that was, I would totally be willing to help out - even if its just sharing their business page! You and your little family are blessed that you are able to support each other in such ways :)

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  10. I agree with you too a point. I have a friend who I love, but she pushes her product down my throat. I don't need to be sent a million of those group messages. On the other hand, I have another friend who sells Scensty she sent me one message letting my know she joined and asked me to "like" her page. She never tags me in images or sends me those group messages. I ended up ordering from the one who didn't cram it down my through. Anyways, my point is I really think it depends on how the person selling handles the situation.

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    1. Totally agree! I never offer friends samples or catalogs or anything unless they ask. I don't like to have stuff shoved in my face, so I refuse to be that kind of sales person.

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  11. I have absolutely no problem with these businesses and businesswomen--and I'll admit, I LOVE the Tastefully Simple parties I've been invited to because I get to stand around and eat the whole time, and I always used to buy items there, too, because they make some tasty stuff! I do have one Facebook friend who posts about what she sells, on average 2x a day, which I can't imagine would attract more customers, but apparently it's working great for me! Currently I don't buy anything from any of these sorts of companies, and I'm sure none of my real-life friends are offended by my lack of purchasing, as I live in China, and even if they did ship to China, the costs are just too expensive and the mail here is scarily unreliable. I don't buy anything online. :)

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  12. Great article. I have many friends who are in direct sales and I may be considering getting into it in the future. I didn't care for the article on Scary Mommy, and I think you have made some great points. If you don't like it, don't look. You don't need to exploit your friendships, but I know for myself, I do buy things occasionally when there is something I need and someone posts about it. I also go to parties when i can because they are fun and I like to support the people I care about. No one has ever, ever forced me to buy at a party. It's tough. You simply can't please everyone, and as long as no one is getting aggressive and listens when I say no, it's all good. :)

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